Saturday, September 3, 2016


I am at a strange cross roads in life. I have completed all the compulsory training I need to do prior to starting a career in cardiology. On paper, I should have been a shoo-in for the job because I had done all the right things and had tons of research to complement my other activities. But I didn't get the job. So I am now at this point in life where I could technically take a break, and I would love to take a break, but people around me are giving conflicting advice. I do not know if taking a break would somehow reduce my chances of getting a cardiology advanced training position in the coming year. Ideally I would love to have a year off, to spend time with my family, to do some humanitarian work and then I would locum around Australia so as not to deplete the bank account too much. But I don't know if this would be a bad idea from a cardiology perspective.

I wish God would just talk to me. I wish He would tell me what to do, in all His infinite wisdom. Sadly, my faith often wavers. Are You really there God? Are you a figment of the imagination of a humanity that cannot cope with the notion of a meaningless life?

It has only been a week since I knew for sure that an accredited advanced training position would be out of reach for the coming year. In the lead up to the Match I was uncertain as to which hospital I wanted to preference. I told God to close the doors that He did not want me to walk through. But if He is truly in control, then really, He's closed them all! It has only been about a week, and I have at times reconciled myself to simply waiting on Him, and for answers in His timing.

But 2nd round offers (non-cardiac) should be opening up pretty soon. Should I apply? Should I leave NSW? Should I go back to Tasmania? Should I go to Sudan? That would be pretty cool. It's an Islamic country. Would I be safe? I have so many questions, but very few answers. I could I suppose cast my net widely - apply for it all. If God does not want me to walk through certain doors, He can close them again.

Father do not forsake me. I am here. Speak.

Philippians 4:6 ESV    
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

John 15:7 ESV    

If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

Mark 11:24 ESV    

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

1 Thessalonians 5:17 ESV    

Pray without ceasing,

Romans 8:26 ESV     

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.         

Luke 11:9 ESV    

And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

Jeremiah 33:3 ESV    

Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.

Matthew 26:41 ESV   

Watch and pray that you may not enter into temptation. The spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.”

1 Timothy 2:5 ESV    

For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus,

Matthew 6:5-8 ESV    

“And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you. “And when you pray, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do, for they think that they will be heard for their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.      

Psalm 34:17 ESV    

When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.      

Luke 18:1 ESV   

And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart.

Matthew 6:9-13 ESV    

Pray then like this: “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Colossians 4:2 ESV    

Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful in it with thanksgiving.

Luke 6:27-28 ESV    

“But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you.

James 5:13-18 ESV    

Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing praise. Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer of faith will save the one who is sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working. Elijah was a man with a nature like ours, and he prayed fervently that it might not rain, and for three years and six months it did not rain on the earth. ...      

Matthew 18:19-20 ESV    

Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”      

Jeremiah 29:12 ESV    

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you.

1 Timothy 2:8 ESV   

I desire then that in every place the men should pray, lifting holy hands without anger or quarreling;      

Matthew 21:22 ESV    

And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith.”

1 John 5:14-15 ESV    

And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.

Luke 11:9-13 ESV    

And I tell you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened. What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent; or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!”      

Psalm 145:18-19 ESV    

The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desire of those who fear him; he also hears their cry and saves them.

Proverbs 15:29 ESV    

The Lord is far from the wicked, but he hears the prayer of the righteous.

John 16:23-24 ESV    

In that day you will ask nothing of me. Truly, truly, I say to you, whatever you ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.      

1 John 3:22 ESV

And whatever we ask we receive from him, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him.

John 9:31 ESV    

We know that God does not listen to sinners, but if anyone is a worshiper of God and does his will, God listens to him.

Matthew 7:7 ESV    

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.

Luke 21:36 ESV    

But stay awake at all times, praying that you may have strength to escape all these things that are going to take place, and to stand before the Son of Man.”

Hebrews 4:16 ESV    

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Proverbs 28:9 ESV    

If one turns away his ear from hearing the law, even his prayer is an abomination.

Luke 18:1-8 ESV   

And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart. He said, “In a certain city there was a judge who neither feared God nor respected man. And there was a widow in that city who kept coming to him and saying, ‘Give me justice against my adversary.’ For a while he refused, but afterward he said to himself, ‘Though I neither fear God nor respect man, yet because this widow keeps bothering me, I will give her justice, so that she will not beat me down by her continual coming.’"     

James 1:6-7 ESV    

But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord;

Romans 12:1-2 ESV   

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

Luke 22:42 ESV    

Saying, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me. Nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.”

Psalm 55:17 ESV    

Evening and morning and at noon I utter my complaint and moan, and he hears my voice.

Matthew 6:9-14 ESV    

Pray then like this: “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. ...

Romans 8:28 ESV    

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

James 4:2 ESV    

You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. You do not have, because you do not ask.

1 Thessalonians 5:25 ESV    

Brothers, pray for us.

Hebrews 5:7 ESV    

In the days of his flesh, Jesus offered up prayers and supplications, with loud cries and tears, to him who was able to save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverence.         

Zechariah 13:9 ESV    

And I will put this third into the fire, and refine them as one refines silver, and test them as gold is tested. They will call upon my name, and I will answer them. I will say, ‘They are my people’; and they will say, ‘The Lord is my God.’”

Psalm 121:1-8 ESV    

A Song of Ascents. I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come? My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth. He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber. Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand. ...         

John 14:13 ESV    

Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son.

Luke 18:10-14 ESV    

“Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.’ But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, ‘God, be merciful to me, a sinner!’ I tell you, this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”         

James 1:5 ESV    

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.

James 4:3 ESV   

You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.        

Deuteronomy 4:7 ESV    

For what great nation is there that has a god so near to it as the Lord our God is to us, whenever we call upon him?

2 Timothy 2:15 ESV   

Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.

Luke 11:4-8 ESV 

And forgive us our sins, for we ourselves forgive everyone who is indebted to us. And lead us not into temptation.” And he said to them, “Which of you who has a friend will go to him at midnight and say to him, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves, for a friend of mine has arrived on a journey, and I have nothing to set before him’; and he will answer from within, ‘Do not bother me; the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed. I cannot get up and give you anything’? I tell you, though he will not get up and give him anything because he is his friend, yet because of his impudence he will rise and give him whatever he needs.

Psalm 23:1-6 ESV / 13 helpful votes

A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. ...

1 Thessalonians 2:9-13 ESV / 12 helpful votes

For you remember, brothers, our labor and toil: we worked night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, while we proclaimed to you the gospel of God. You are witnesses, and God also, how holy and righteous and blameless was our conduct toward you believers. For you know how, like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory. And we also thank God constantly for this, that when you received the word of God, which you heard from us, you accepted it not as the word of men but as what it really is, the word of God, which is at work in you believers.

Luke 22:31-32 ESV 

“Simon, Simon, behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers.”

Isaiah 40:31 ESV 

But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.

Psalm 55:22 ESV 

Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.

Nehemiah 1:11 ESV / 9 helpful votes

O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of your servant, and to the prayer of your servants who delight to fear your name, and give success to your servant today, and grant him mercy in the sight of this man.” Now I was cupbearer to the king.

1 Kings 3:3-15 ESV / 9 helpful votes

Solomon loved the Lord, walking in the statutes of David his father, only he sacrificed and made offerings at the high places. And the king went to Gibeon to sacrifice there, for that was the great high place. Solomon used to offer a thousand burnt offerings on that altar. At Gibeon the Lord appeared to Solomon in a dream by night, and God said, “Ask what I shall give you.” And Solomon said, “You have shown great and steadfast love to your servant David my father, because he walked before you in faithfulness, in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart toward you. And you have kept for him this great and steadfast love and have given him a son to sit on his throne this day. And now, O Lord my God, you have made your servant king in place of David my father, although I am but a little child. I do not know how to go out or come in. ...

1 Peter 5:7 ESV 

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.

Romans 8:34 ESV / 8 helpful votes

Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.

Matthew 2:1-23 ESV / 8 helpful votes

Now after Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the east came to Jerusalem, saying, “Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him.” When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him; and assembling all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born. They told him, “In Bethlehem of Judea, for so it is written by the prophet: ...

Isaiah 26:3 ESV / 8 helpful votes

You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.

Romans 8:1-39 ESV / 7 helpful votes

There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life has set you free in Christ Jesus from the law of sin and death. For God has done what the law, weakened by the flesh, could not do. By sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and for sin, he condemned sin in the flesh, in order that the righteous requirement of the law might be fulfilled in us, who walk not according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit. ...

Matthew 27:50-51 ESV / 7 helpful votes

And Jesus cried out again with a loud voice and yielded up his spirit. And behold, the curtain of the temple was torn in two, from top to bottom. And the earth shook, and the rocks were split.

Psalm 91:1-16 ESV / 7 helpful votes

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will abide in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say to the Lord, “My refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” For he will deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, ...

Psalm 66:18 ESV / 7 helpful votes

If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened.

2 Chronicles 7:1-22 ESV / 7 helpful votes

As soon as Solomon finished his prayer, fire came down from heaven and consumed the burnt offering and the sacrifices, and the glory of the Lord filled the temple. And the priests could not enter the house of the Lord, because the glory of the Lord filled the Lord's house. When all the people of Israel saw the fire come down and the glory of the Lord on the temple, they bowed down with their faces to the ground on the pavement and worshiped and gave thanks to the Lord, saying, “For he is good, for his steadfast love endures forever.” Then the king and all the people offered sacrifice before the Lord. King Solomon offered as a sacrifice 22,000 oxen and 120,000 sheep. So the king and all the people dedicated the house of God. ...

Hebrews 11:1 ESV / 6 helpful votes

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

Ephesians 6:19-20 ESV / 6 helpful votes

And also for me, that words may be given to me in opening my mouth boldly to proclaim the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains, that I may declare it boldly, as I ought to speak.

Romans 12:12 ESV 

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.

Matthew 6:25-34 ESV 

“Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ...

Haggai 1:1-15 ESV / 6 helpful votes

In the second year of Darius the king, in the sixth month, on the first day of the month, the word of the Lord came by the hand of Haggai the prophet to Zerubbabel the son of Shealtiel, governor of Judah, and to Joshua the son of Jehozadak, the high priest: “Thus says the Lord of hosts: These people say the time has not yet come to rebuild the house of the Lord.” Then the word of the Lord came by the hand of Haggai the prophet, “Is it a time for you yourselves to dwell in your paneled houses, while this house lies in ruins? Now, therefore, thus says the Lord of hosts: Consider your ways. ...

Wednesday, June 15, 2016


The number of times I have felt slighted because of my gender has been countless. The number of times my male (and female) counterparts have silenced me, or taken me less seriously, are many. People will not acknowledge a problem that exists, if it does not exist in their world. If they do not experience the slights because they are any combination of rich, white, or male. We have come to a point where people will accept the presence of 'White Privilege' as a concept, but they do not truly believe that their accomplishments are any easier to come by as a result. And they do not care. Why would they when the establishment is in their favour?

I have come to learn many things about being female. I have learnt that some times we play a role in our own destruction. We wait to be rescued, or to be handed a hall pass, because for many years we have not been expected to excel on our own merit. We wait for mentors, without realising that mentors pick people in whom they see something worthwhile. But I have also come to recognise the gross injustice that exists against women. I have learnt to stand up for your woman-kind, sometimes just because she is female. Someone has to do it, and if everyone helps one woman forward, then perhaps there will be enough of us at the top, to change the system. I have learnt to let go of some battles. You can choose to believe that a man you loved has used you, lied to you, left you, or you can hold on to the decent memories (I hope there were some) and move on with your life. No one is more hurt by your rumination than yourself. I have learnt to let go of as many grudges as I can, to laugh more, in the face of injustice, because bitterness will eat you up inside.

I have learnt to appreciate the few people, male or female, people you have met or whose words you have only read, people who inspire you, encourage you, and help you along the way. I am eager to succeed in spite of my femininity. I am resolved to make it there, a better person than I am now. I think if we were to dwell only in the secular, then this is the best goal, the most satisfying goal; to be a decent human being, to have bided our time in the pursuit of goals and to reside in the warm embrace of friends, family and relationships.

Tuesday, April 12, 2016

Reflections - On whether I am on the right path in life.

I have spent the past 3 months working with a particular resident at my hospital. Some times when you walk around the hospital it is like walking in a Marcs/Country Road/CUE showroom. Many of our doctors come from affluent backgrounds - whose fathers, and sometimes mothers are doctors, university chancellors, business-people, lawyers, politicians. I often wonder if they have ever had difficulties in life. If they know what it means to earn your keep, and to actually have to work for their 'achievements'. Many of them live at home, or in homes paid for by their wealthy and protective parents. Their biggest problems is probably divorce between those parents. They travel extensively, with numerous photos of their exotic exploits posted onto Facebook. They are athletic, intelligent and beautiful. They will often go on to marry other wealthy individuals, usually surgeons, cardiologists, lawyers. They have massive impractical heirlooms on their ring fingers. They are entitled. They will express their anger when their workload is heavy and they will expect you to share it with them, although you have previously paid your dues. They will throw you under a bus because they think their 'right' to an easy life has been infringed upon, and it makes them angry. Junior medical doctors these days are an impetuous lot, quick to anger, ready to answer back.

When I entered medicine, I did not think I would be joining the ranks of such wealthy, self-serving, high-'achieving' individuals. I had romantic notions of an apprenticeship, where you learn how to assess, diagnose and treat your patients, from senior clinicians. I thought I would become an expert on medical diseases, and that I would spend some time with patients, and some time with my books and research papers.

I look around me and people seem happy with the current state of affairs. It makes me wonder if the problem lies with me. But this is not what I intended. I wonder if that is to come, or if I should count my losses and find another path. As easy as life in Australia can be, I wonder if Australia is not the place for me.

Friday, January 22, 2016

The Patient

I once had a patient - he was young, by inpatient standards, but had lived a life of sex, booze and drugs, resulting in viral hepatitis and hepatocellular (liver) cancer. He came to our hospital because of abdominal pain and his doctors found that the cancer had spread to his lungs. He came to my attention one evening when I was asked to review him for severe pain. By the end of the evening, he had bled into his liver and this leaked (via the cancer) into his abdominal cavity. The surgical registrar came to see him that night. "Sir, you have bled into your abdominal cavity and there is nothing we can do about that okay?" the surgical registrar said gently.

The patient looked up at the registrar. "Not even a transplant?"
"No, that's not going to work."
"Am I going to die?"
"If you continue bleeding into the cavity. But we will ensure that you are not in pain."

We asked if there was anyone he would like us to call. There was no one he said. He was not in touch with the family he had. Later, he gave us the phone number of a friend. We left a message when no one came to the phone. We found out later that the number belonged to a homeless shelter.

He lived another 24 hours. The next evening, I was told that he was crying. He asked for more pain medication, so we kept our promise and kept him comfortable. He died that evening. Life can sometimes end abruptly - what do we leave behind? Who do we leave behind? And does it really matter?

Thursday, November 26, 2015


Being at the airport always gives me pause to reflect on the life that goes on around me, on my trajectory and on the things I have gained or lost. This year, flying has taken on a further nuance - the loss of three Malaysian planes in 2014, the wars of the Middle East which have spread west - while I cannot put my life on hold, I am reminded of the frailty of life which makes reflection all the more pertinent.

When I was a child I would sit in front of the telly, eyes glued to the screen, impatient for the day my 'adventures' would begin. On my daily bike rides, it was almost as though if I cycled fast enough I could propel myself into the future where all the fun stuff would begin.

I am now well into that future. In the beginning, it all seemed so exciting; there were so many possibilities. I have often wondered why my day-to-day is not as thrilling now as I expected it to be. As it is, my life is so close to what I wanted as a child. To my mind that should make me happier than I am. It occurs to me that the future seemed shinier because back then there were so many alternative endings. On Monday I could pretend that I would one day be a financier living on Wall Street. On Tuesday I would be an aid worker with the UN. On Wednesday I would marry my favourite pop star. But the thing about life is that we have to choose a single path. We cannot be all those things. So being a doctor every day, while being a life I cannot fault, is one that is not as exciting as my little heart had wanted it to be.

I met someone last year, who had actually been all those things. He too went on an adventure when he was a teenager. Then became an economist in England, then a consultant with the UN. He met a girl, moved to Australia, became a doctor. His is the future I am heading to, except he's taken the long route, stopping along the way, at all those pit stops I conjured up many years ago. I suppose it is possible, but when you've been there and done that, you'll find yourself at 40 years of age.

I am plagued by the eternal question - what have we been given this life for? In all things, I strive to make the right choices. But usually the right choice requires us to have an end in mind. I do not know to what ends I am working. I could have the nicest things, the nicest home, the nicest clothes, the nicest friends. I could be in Sydney, London or New York. I could become a cardiologist one day. But somehow I feel that every milestone will be fleeting. Every twist and turn and manoeuvre, marked by the same question - is this what you wanted? What about this? Is this enough? I already know the answer.

Tuesday, June 30, 2015


There are moments when I wonder if I have gotten it all wrong. There is music in my mind that cannot be expressed through medicine. Today I broke out in dance because the day to day in medicine bores me. Naturally, my boss was not too impressed. Is this really what I want to spend the rest of my life doing? But what else really, could I do? While I do not have an answer, sometimes I feel like I've really gotten it wrong. Yet, I doubt I would have enjoyed anything else. It leaves me hopeless. There is a music trapped inside that cannot be expressed. So it is tearing down the walls. There is a battle inside of me. Eating me inside. And that gnawing thought that I have really gotten it all wrong.

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Life Zzzzzzzzzzzz

I always feel like life needs to be packed with amazing and exciting things... so it never feels right when my weekends are empty. I get bored, and boredom doesn't sit well with me! It will be A.W.E.S.O.M.E. when I am back in my own apartment with pretty furniture and the amazing Apple iMac that I will finally buy and UNLIMITEDDDDD internet. It will certainly be really really awesome.